using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Randomize
