everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
