JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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