Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
