Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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