Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
well you can't waste a boner
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
