I just saw a hot homeless man
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
