they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
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