Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
