Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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