why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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