I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
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