Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Randomize
