No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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