Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
