Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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