what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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