i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
