bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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