your thong is hanging out like whoa
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
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