i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
