just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
