Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Randomize
