can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
