Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize