So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
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