yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
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