he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
