if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
