so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
Randomize
