had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
