We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
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