Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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