Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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