I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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