butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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