maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
