You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
