I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
nutella sex= disaster
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
We had sex on a dog bed..
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
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