my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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