fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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