i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
