Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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