Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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