I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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