I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize