I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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