Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
