is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
