Rock
Scissors
Fuck
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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